Like I said via YIM - very nice piece of writing, I loved it.
If you want some con-crit, I'd say that some moments are a bit exaggerated with emotions (it doesn't make the story any worse to me, though), and probably Lisa's sudden decision to jump from the cliff when she wasn't familiar with her wings yet, the decision to learn to fly or to die was a little harsh. But that moment -
Some bits of cloud had followed her to her resting spot as they encircled the little girl. She suddenly didn't seem quite as little as she always was.
has really touched me... beautiful scene, and easy to imagine.
Overall, very nice work. Thank you for writing it!
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