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Title: "Mi Mancherai" My Fanfic c: Post by: Anna-Unforgiven on September 29, 2008, 07:31 OK, so the post is too long... XD
Please read and give me suggestions or constructive crit and such. x) http://www.fanfiction.net/s/3835657/1/Mi_Mancherai Thank you! I really hope you enjoy it. Title: Re: "Mi Mancherai" My Fanfic c: Post by: CalculatedChaos on September 29, 2008, 08:03 I loved what you've done so far and I know you have more on the way so I'll post a real review once it's up.
Just a suggestion: you can upload a word document (or whatever wordprocessing program you use) as a .doc or .txt (among others) if you click on the additonal options button in full-post mode. Title: Re: "Mi Mancherai" My Fanfic c: Post by: Empethree on October 01, 2008, 03:08 Very nice start. You have done a good job of setting the scene and the characters. The plot starts off with familiar territory but the ideas so far are interesting.
Characters are captured very well and I can imagine what everything looks like. Only one minor gripe, but it actually made me chuckle: Quote She had already caused, accidentally, a number of injuries for the others. Nothing minor, but enough to get them frustrated. Seems like she has caused some bad injuries, no wonder they were fustrated lol :) I am sure it should of read "Nothing Major" Seriously it is a really excellent start to a story and I am really looking forward to more. -Carl |